Posts Tagged ‘ record stores ’

I hate me, part 862,999

Phone call, sounded like a middle aged woman:

(phone rings) Jack’s Music…

… (silence)…

Hello..Jack’s Music

…oh, I thought you said “not Jack’s Music”

Uh…no…this is Jack’s Music…answering the phone “not Jack’s Music” is kind of uh…odd …don’t you think

Ummm….well if you were somebody that…uh got a lot of wrong numbers calling you… looking for Jack’s Music, you…um…might answer the phone that way…

…ok…uh…well what can I help you with

Ummm…now I’ve forgotten…I’ll call back

Maybe this store exists somewhere

I hate me, part 850,301

Middle aged couple, looked like they were killing time waiting for a table at a nearby restaurant, they guy did all the talking.

I’m looking for a band…………

Uh huh, none of our used records are on file but it’s alphabetical in that row you’re standing by

I’m not sure if you got ‘em……..I don’t know if you know ‘em……I don’t know where to look……..

Well it’s alphabetical

DUKE JUPITER!

If we had any they’d be in D

Can you look it up?

None of our used records are on file

Found one! Yeah!….awwww, I already got this…you got the other ones….they got different covers, I think they’re white.

Yeah, I don’t know if we have any others

Dude, I need ‘em….even cassettes….but not this one (holds up the album that he didn’t want)

Yeah, sorry man, whatever’s out there

(Heavy sigh, mumbled to his wife as they were leaving)…I would have taken cassettes

I hate me, part 817,045

Friday night, middle aged guy, kind of wired, at the back counter:

You got that AIDS benefit from the 70’s or the 80’s…Queen was in it

Do you mean Live Aid the big benefit for the famine in Africa that Queen played?

Naaahh…it was for AIDS…lots of bands, Queen…you know AIDS…live AIDS.

Do you mean the concert that was in the film Bohemian Rhapsody?

Yeah, Live AIDS…you know the guy from Queen…uh…he had AIDS..so, uh Live AIDS.

We don’t have it

I hate me part 888,751

Older middle aged guy, a little drinky, looking through the new arrivals LP rack

Yeah, so records are back, are these in any order?

I explained our filing system

So, no good stuff…I’m surprised you don’t have the good…popular stuff.

Well, popular stuff sells.

Yeah, but are you telling me people are still buying the Stones?

Yeah, Rolling Stones records sell.

Really? I took my daughter to see ‘em…so…you have a guy in his 50’s taking a 30 year old to see a 70 year old…amazing…so where’s the good stuff?…Olton John, I don’t see his stuff in the O’s

Well, his name is Elton John and we file him in the J’s

Oh… so where’s the good stuff?

I did a fake phone call and hid in the back until he left

I hate me, part 855,987

Two more

1)

Older guy with a plain cloth tote bag containing the records he was looking to sell. After we made a deal on the records, he picked up his bag,

What do you think of this bag…does it look like a ladies bag?

No, just looks like a tote bag

It doesn’t uh…make me look uh…ah….

You look like a guy who’s carrying a bag of records

No….no…that’s not what mean..uh…ah it doesn’t matter…it’s not my bag anyway…so ya‘ know…

That’s cool, it’s just a bag.

Yup, it’s just a bag…that’s not mine

2)

We got a sealed Tool-10,000 Days cd exchanged at the store with a cryptic note from the cashier on it “returned because it’s a cover band”. It seems that a father and son bought the cd and quickly brought it back and instead of saying we bought the wrong cd, can we switch it for something else. The father said he googled the album and his google search said that it wasn’t actually Tool that made 10,000 days but a cover band and couldn’t be convinced otherwise.

I hate me , part 884,907

End of the day closing. We made the announcements, closing in 10 minutes…closing in 5..we’re closed. The last people, a middle aged couple, headed up front with nothing. Then they saw a rack of Jack’s Music shirts. the guy (who was looking at the shirts) was roughly my size, XXL.

(holds up shirt to show his wife) I think I can fit into a large

…I don’t know…are you sure?…maybe something….bigger?

Nah, I got this…(looks at the shirt again)…you think something bigger?

Yes…bigger…yes

(He holds up an XL)…this’ll be good, right?

It’s now about five minutes after we closed, and there is no way that this guy is fitting into an XL, so I piped in.

“Look man, we’re about the same size and I’m wearing a XXL of that shirt, they fit good.”

He looked me up and down, made a lemon face

…yeah…I think I’m gonna go with the XL

He finally headed to the counter, as he was getting rung up

…maybe I’ll try this on…just to make sure it fits (looks at his wife)…right?

He wore a polo shirt and he tried to put the t-shirt over that. It didn’t go well and I’m thinking “if the shirt doesn’t fit, you must acquit”, after a long minute of shirt wrestling, he admitted defeat and bought the XXL. And the long national nightmare was over

I Hate Me, part 838,042

Saturday morning guy looking through the new LP arrivals, started talking wasn’t sure it was directed at me

Bob Seger..Night Moves….Supertramp…REO…

(distorted woman’s voice) what!…Supertramp?…which one?

…you know…Give a Little Bit ‘s on it

Yeah…we got it

I look over the counter and the guy is on FaceTime and their voices are getting louder

Bruce..The Rive (gets cut off)

The What?!

THE RIVER!

Is it good?

Yeah, we like that one

NO! Is it in good shape?

Looks alright

Ok

Til Tuesday…Scandal…Lita Ford, you like her

Which one?

Dancin’ On The Edge

No, I don’t like that one

Ok

The Cars, Candy-O…U2, Blood Red..something…

What songs were on the Lita Ford?

…uh lemme find it.

This went on for about 5 minutes, his iPad lying on a row of records he wasn’t looking thru, which he had to move it a few times for other customers, who were giving him the side eye. He eventually left with nothing.