Posts Tagged ‘ record store ’

I Hate Me, pt 639,153

Jack’s Music on a Sunday has a fair amount of people who don’t usually go to record stores and it’s a bit like a curio shop, there are also non traditional customers. This was one who was observed by Jon. A younger guy had a couple of cd’s and he had them lying flat on a counter, he looked like he was trying to decide between them. He finally decided by taking a crystal on a string which he held above them and let the crystal determine which one to purchase. The winner was a Steve Vai cd, I’m not sure who the loser was.

A favorite of man and crystal alike

A favorite of man and crystal alike

I Hate Me, part 672,826

I was at work coming back from getting a cup of coffee and I soon as I stepped in I realized I should have walked slower getting there. A couple and their kid and while I wouldn’t call them crazy, I would definitely use eccentric. The wife addressed me first
You look like you work here, I want the Beach Boys and The Stylistics or somebody like the Beach Boys
I show here The Stylistics section
What’s this?
The Stylistics, like you asked for
Oh he has these…where are the Beachboys…Beach…Boys…..Beach…..Boys
Over they are
Are these LIKE the Beachboys…Beach..Boys?
They ARE the Beach Boys
she wandered over to the soundtrack section, seconds later
Her husband who was looking thru the blues section
Who you talkin’ to!?!
You!!…..I didn’t say nothin’!!……PIPPIN!!
What!!..…I can’t believe he’s dead!!
B.B. King!!
They left and bought nothing



I Hate Me, Part 610,777

Odd day at work yesterday, it seemed like a parade of slightly off customers. Nothing like, “Christ, this guy’s a lunatic” but more of the low level head scratching variety. Two examples
Guy calls up pretty frantic
Do you got a song called “Pour me another fucking drink, goddamnit!” or it might be “Fucking goddamnit, pour me another goddamn drink!”?…I dunno who sings it
Really? That’s what it’s called “Pour me another fucking drink”…
Yeah, Goddamnit
I think that’s it
Ok…( I looked it up, nothing)
Yeah, I’m not getting any matches on that title
huhhhrr…maybe it’s “Goddammit…..Pour me another fucking drink…..goddammit”…I don’t fucking know…I’ll call ya back
Ok then

We sell replacement jewel cases for cd’s. They’re a dollar apiece for the case and the tray. An older guy comes to the back counter and talks to Matt
I can’t afford to pay 75 cents for those jewel cases
Well they’re a dollar apiece
75 cents is too much for them, what if I bought a lot of ‘em, like five can you do better than 75 cents?
They are a dollar for each one, I don’t know where you’re getting 75 cents from
I drove all the way from Eatontown (10 minutes away), is 75 cents the best you can do?
Well, no because they’re a dollar apiece.
So you can’t do better than 75 cents each…(heavy sigh)
He bought three.

I Hate me, pt. 530,610

There’s this guy who thinks that we carry everything that’s media based from every era and is always bitterly disappointed when we don’t have something like Batman trading cards from the 60’s, “*heavy sigh*…really?! you guys don’t got it? I was sure you would…*heavy sigh*”. He came by the back counter, no greeting just right into it, like we had just talked (it had been close to a year since he was in last):
This one’s easy, you should be able to get this
Really? Are you sure? You don’t have a great track record on finding stuff..
Yeah…Eric Clapton…….(looks at me)
Clapton we got
Eric Clapton…Journeyman…..(looks at me)
We probably have that cd
Eric Clapton…Journeyman…Tour shirt…original….(looks at me)
Goddamn it, you were so close man, if you just stopped at Eric Clapton Journeyman
(dead stare)…in black with orange lettering…. and tour dates…on the back
No man…we’re not gonna have that…ya gotta find that kind of stuff on line or…get a time machine and go back…sorry…but man…jeez…
*heavy sigh* I thought you could get it…or have it…how about this (points to some scribble on a paper bag )
I’m sorry man, I can’t read that
yeah…*heavy sigh*
then he walked out

I Hate Me part 529,015

Saturday afternoon at work. Stocky mouth-breather in his thirties, modified dyed black pompadour and sideburns, long denim shorts and slightly too small skull and crossbones t-shirt. Looking through our used soundtrack LP section, where there’s maybe 150-200 albums.
Holding up a record with his back to everyone, loudly and to nobody in particular:
Where are the prices?
…on the back
now turning around
I don’t see it
I point out the large Jacks sticker with a price on it
Oh…it just looks like a sticker from your store.
yeah, with the price on it… the numbers tell you how much it costs.
yeah…yeah…are these even broken down into sections?
well yeah you’re in the soundtrack…
(interrupts) No No dude IN the sections are there SECTIONS ?
No man, there’s only one row of soundtracks, should take you about a minute to go through
(heavy sigh)…oooh man
Bought the Grease soundtrack.

I Hate Me, part 510,729

Phone call, another metal guy, a bit frantic:
Hey man…I NEED some black metal
Ok, who are you looking for?
I dunno…but it’s gotta be extreme bro…really EXTREME…you know the blackest metal…it don’t have to be European either.
Wellllll…we got a bunch of metal, some black, some know it would really help if you knew what you’re looking for… you should checkout some stuff online…might give you an idea of what you’re looking for
what?…no…no bro…no…you know what I want, you know. The blackest stuff….thick…extreme…heavy and blazing thrash…blazing…you know, bro….I guess they can be Norwegian…but it’s gotta be black metal…gotta
Yeah..that doesn’t make a lot of sense. Look, go onto YouTube look for black metal, check out some some stuff, find out what you like and then go from there.
Noooo…no..I don’t trust YouTube…But you got metal, right bro?
…yeah we got metal
mmmmm…I might just come down and check it out

still waiting

I Hate Me, part 529,023

Wild eyed freak looking for Darkthrone cd’s
Hey, man…I gotta ‘nother question…maybe you could answer this…I used to play alto sax…I know, right…an then I started taking black and white photos…and…man…man…maaaaan…that’s man…that’s fuckin’…mind-blowing…woah…yeah…yeah……wowhahahahahahaha……thanks a lot man.

and then he ate my soul.