Posts Tagged ‘ dune ’

Nerd Theater II

[Because no one asked for it, another short play about Dune]
Used Car Dealer on Dune II
by Tim Cronin & Matt Boudiette

Used Car Dealer:Hello sir. You know you don’t have to be a Mentat to know you’ll always find the lowest prices right here at Harry Harkonen’s Home of Bargain Used Vehicles, now how can I help you?
Customer: I’m just looking around, thanks
Used Car Dealer: I see you’re looking at this little beauty it was driven by a little old Reverend Mother of the Bene Gesserit order.
Customer: Hmmmm, yeah ya know the milage looks a little high doesn’t it?
Used Car Dealer: Well sir, what do you expect she folded space from Giedi Prime to fly it on the lot.
Customer: Shai Hulud!
Used Car Dealer:Yes sir, Shai Hulud! it is a great deal
Customer: No, No, there’s a Shai Hulud and it’s headed our way!
Used Car Dealer: Aaaiiieeee!!!
Customer: Aaaauuurrrggghhh!!

Nerd Theater

a used Ornithopter

Used Car Dealer on Dune
by Tim Cronin and Matt Boudiette

[the scene: a used car dealership on Dune]

CustomerHey, I’m no mentat but this used Ornithopter is pretty expensive and I’m more than a little worried with all the miles on it.

Used Car Salesman– That’s perfectly alright, sir. We don’t want a Gom Jabbar here. You shouldn’t be worried, fear is the mind killer and this baby has been in for all it’s regular maintenance and oil changes. What do we need to get you in this Ornithopter today?

Customer- You guys always use the “fear is the mind killer” thing when somebody has a legit gripe, c’mon how about lower the price a bit.

Used Car Salesman- Mmmmm I’m gonna have to talk to the Kwisatz Haderach, wait here.

[the salesman goes to see the Kwisatz Haderach, 5 minutes pass]

Used Car Salesman– Sorry, no can do, but he did say we could throw in free undercoating.

Customer- Sold!

Harold & Maud’Dib

Harold & Maud’Dib is part of the Museum of Television Network (MOTN) series entitled “Orphans”. A month long retrospective on TV shows that had extremely short runs (less than four episodes) or never made it past the pilot stage.
Harold & Maud’Dib was a science fiction-buddy-comedy series that tried to capitalize on the blockbuster sci-fi move Dune and the quirky appeal of actor Bud Cort. It ran for two weeks as a summer replacement in 1986. The premise of the half hour show was Paul Maud’Dib (Kyle Maclachlin) the future leader of the free universe is caught in a time warp while inspecting “spice mines” on the planet of Arrakis. He winds up in present day Los Angeles in the office of a mopey, down on his luck private investigator Harold (Bud Cort) who’s still mourning the death of his octogenarian lover, Maude. In the first of the two episodes “Getting to Know You”, Harold is still convinced that Paul is crazy and introduces him to his psychiatrist friend Mona (Margot Kidder). Paul saves the day by using the “weirding ways” on a bunch of thugs sent by Boss Rocco (Efram Zimbalist Jr.). The second episode “The Mix-Up” has Harold trying to find a spice called Melange that Paul is always talking about (this was supposed to be an ongoing theme), in this episode he winds up with Saffron. Paul meanwhile is investigating a case involving Freemasons which he confuses with the Freman from planet Arrikas and is almost arrested when he keeps insisting that he’s their leader. This episode also featured ex-football player Joe Nameth as Duke Hooper a streetwise informant.
Harold & Maud’Dib failed to capitalize on “Dune Fever” which never really materialized and was replaced after two weeks with reruns of Pig in a Poke.

Check local listings for time and date
.harold2Kyle MacLachlin