Archive for the ‘ Uncategorized ’ Category

Notes From Das Boot 120

Tromso, Norway 7/15/11
The constant daylight really fucks with sleeping, it’s a bit disorienting. Just woke up, early airport call then flight to Oslo, where we drive two hours to the Slottsfjell festival play and then back to airport for any early flight to Dusseldorf and get picked up by the bus then drive to to the Zwarte Cross festival in Holland and then fly home Sunday. Bukta festival was great. Hard to believe it was the middle of the summer, it was about 40 degrees and cold rain. Need coffee.

Guitar Wolf


Notes from Das Boot 119

Tromsa, Norway 7/14/11
It’s pretty cool up here, it’s like if you stuck a New England fishing town into H.P. Lovecraft’s Mountains of Madness. Ominous mountains appearing and vanishing through the thick rainy clouds. Went to a place called Bla Rock Cafe yesterday where I had a Monster Magnet burger, it was a burger with brie cheese and sliced steak on it. The original recipe called for tiny magnets, but they got complaints. Also on the menu are The Radio Birdman (fried radios in bird sauce) and The Beasts of Bourbon (a shot of bourbon served in a fur cup), so we’re in good company. It’s been raining and about fifty degrees for the last week or so and today is no different. Grinderman and Guitar Wolf are playing tonight, which should be cool. We’re missing Mudhoney and The Black Lips who will be playing tomorrow.

I just found that an extension cord I have looks like a horribly racist black face caricature

The Monster Magnet burger

Notes from Das Boot 118

Dusseldorf, Germany 7/12/2011
I was hoping this is where Tim Conway’s: Dorf On Golf series originated, but A) it isn’t and B) I’m an old nerdy douche for even thinking that much less writing it. The Dorf series started out in good fun but when he tackled weightier subjects like “Dorf on Human Trafficking” and “Dorf on Race Relations” it lost it’s charm. Anywho, we played in Luxembourg yesterday at the “Rockhal” and it was nice to play in a real venue instead of camping. The day was almost ruined when I had  a run in with a towel dispenser. A lot of venue bathrooms have the forced air hand dryer system that comes in a variety of different shapes and sizes. So after i washed my hands I stuck my wet hands under what I thought was a hand dryer and I waited a few seconds and nothing, a few more seconds and “WHATTHEFUCKISWRONGWITHTHISPIECEOFSHIT!” I looked closer and saw that there was a towel sticking out of the bottom of it. I got angry at it for tricking me and I punched it, resulting in me scraping my knuckles and no damage to the towel dispenser at all. That towel dispenser has made a formidable enemy, well maybe not that formidable. We get up at 4:30am tomorrow and fly to Oslo, Norway then fly to Tromso, Norway which is about 200 miles from the North Pole. Hopefully there will be enough time to take a trip to Santa’s Workshop or Superman’s Fortress of Solitude (If Superman is being a dick it’s referred to as the Fortress of Attitude).

my newest inanimate enemy, a towel dispenser

The beloved Dorf

Notes From das Boot 117

7/11/11, Luxembourg
Played the Stoned From the Underground Festival a couple of days ago, it’s somewhat newish and I think this was the first one outdoors. It was cool. Just a small recommendation: if you’re going to serve spicy lentil soup in catering, make sure you have more than two port-a-jons backstage for the six bands, their crew and local crew. Paint the picture yourself. Did see one of the most amazing live bands ever there, Church of Misery. On record they’re real good but live, holy shit they were great. Heavy, speedy and Sabbathy. They played with a ferocious unhinged abandon that I haven’t seen in quite awhile. Have seen some great bands this tour; Clutch, Melvins, Graveyard and now Church of Misery

Phil with a pack east-German cigarettes, special "sore throat" blend

Sunday music 7/10/11

DMZ-Bad Attitude
DMZ was a great under appreciated band from Boston in the late 70’s. This slice of Stooges inspired grunt is from their their 1978 self titled album produced by Flo & Eddie. Singer Jeff “monoman” Connally went on to form the Lyres.

Notes From Das Boot 116

Erfurt, Germany 7/9/11
Got through the 25 hour drive more or less in one piece. Hotel is actually in the train station, I was lulled awake by the constant metallic screeching of the trains (at least I think it was the trains, hopefully not some dark Erfurt secret). Saw the band Graveyard when we played Getaway Festival on the 7th, great stuff.  Heavy blues rock played with bong rattling authenticity by a bunch of longhairs. While I am technically awake, I still haven’t had a coffee yet and I like to mention something that has bugged me for awhile: People who applaud when the their plane lands. Coming back from Greece the majority of the passengers applauded when the pilot made a routine landing. If we landed safely in some kind of storm of biblical proportions or if the wings fell off, then fine, applaud away. It’s his job to land the plane safely. I don’t applaud when I get correct change at the store or if my food is the way I ordered it at a restaurant. It’s in the pilots beat interests not to crash the plane. If the pilot crashed our plane am I supposed to spend my last few moments as a living human being booing him. I also hate assholes who applaud at a movie theater when a movie ends. Who’s hearing you? Is the director or the actors hiding incognito in the theater? You’re cheering an inanimate object. I don’t go to a museum and applaud paintings I like…I really need a fucking coffee

now we are many

Notes From das Boot 115

Karlskoga, Sweden 7/6/11
We are at the Putte I Parken Festival today, also on the bill are Paramore and Ke$ha. As we were pulling up a bunch of kids thought that our bus contained Paramore and were bitterly disappointed to find out it contained us. We told them we were Paramore’s parents but they didn’t believe us, or care. On another unimportant note, Swedish meatballs are just called meatballs over here and why wouldn’t they be. Another festival in Sweden tomorrow and then a 25 hour drive to East Germany, just for fun.

"Bla" The swedish beer that reviews itself: "So, how's that beer?" "Bla..."


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