I Hate Me, part 402,887

I was walking through the municipal parking lot behind the store and I saw somebody I knew, we had a conversation that was conducted about 25 feet from each other. He wanted to lend me a record he just bought which he thought I would like. I didn’t want to borrow it because I’m not a particularly good borrower:
Me-NO THANKS…I’M NOT A GOOD BORROWER!
Luke-…WHAT!
ME- I’M A SHIT BORROWER!
Luke- WHAT!
Me-SHIT BORROWER…I’M A SHIT BORROWER…DON’T LEND ME ANYTHING!
As I yelled “Shit Borrower” I noticed there was a woman putting packages in her car who was glaring at me. I’m now sure it was because I was cursing loudly in the parking lot. Being a mental patient I thought that she thought I literally borrowed shit from people. It was only a fleeting thought but it was enough where I thought I should (over) explain myself.
Me- No..I meant that I’m not good at borrowing things…not the other thing…the other way…that it could be taken…
I got one last well earned glare and she drove off and I slunk back to work

"neither a borrower nor a lender be" especially when it comes to shit

“neither a borrower nor a lender be” especially when it comes to shit

    • galbacco
    • January 16th, 2014

    Maybe she thought you were a giant rabbit that was really bad at digging…

    • foxycotic
    • January 17th, 2014

    maybe she felt caught
    because she has just borrowed those precious packages (that she was putting in her car)
    and has planned right from the start to never give them back…

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