I’ve been busy and lazy, a shit combination for somebody who says he likes to write…Some notes from over the Christmas holidays at work:

Older guy who comes in, a bit off, likes old nudist movies, it’s almost wholesome at this point. He bought a Playboy dvd a few years ago and it freaked him out.
Guy-Do you have any other nudist movies?
Me- No man, I think you got all we could get in
Guy-………..so can you get any others?
Me-I’d need a title, we don’t have a breakdown of nudist movies on our computer that we can order.
Silence and he’s not leaving, it’s getting (more) uncomfortable
Me-……yeah…..I’d need a title….to order
Guy-……….mmmmmmmm………happy nude year?
Me-Diiid you just make that title up?
I looked up the title, no go.
Me- not listed, sorry
I went into the back until he left

Crazy drunk guy ordered 2 copies of Dr. Buzzard’s Original Savannah Band. Was really psyched when they came in and started to make a bit of a commotion, it was about 11am
Guy-Alright I got my two and I need two more! They make great fucking gifts! So then I’ll have four, right!?
Me- yeah, ok two more, we’ll give you a call.
Guy-And then I need six more
Me-Ok, so you want eight more all together.
Guy-No! I want six more pluuuuuss the two I ordered.
Me-the two you ordered last week and just picked up or the two you just ordered thirty seconds ago?
Me-OK, try and follow me here, you ordered two last week and picked them up today
Me- then you ordered two more, about a minute ago
Me- then you just ordered six more after that
Me-So that’s eight (I held up 8 fingers) more you’re ordering all together?
Guy………………….yesssssss…..eighhhht more
A week later we get his order in and he comes in to pick them up. He comes to the back counter to complain
Guy- Did I order eight of these?
Me-Yeah.. you bought two then ordered two more then ordered six more right after that. You said they make gifts
Guy-They do…I must have been drunk but they do make great gifts.

I hear they make great gifts

I hear they make great gifts


  1. You know, being drunk makes a great gift…

    • the artist formely known as Tiina
    • January 7th, 2014

    Spank, stop bothering Tim! You already have all the nudist movies ever made!

      • Spank
      • January 7th, 2014

      True, but I don’t have eight copies of each, so I’m not i>that depraved.

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