I Hate Me, part 394,330

I had to run to A&P after work. It was about 9pm and usually they’ll close one of the entrances at night, but I’m never sure what time this happens since I don’t go there that often. Instead of using the out of the way door that’s always open I always try the regular door but like Charlie Brown and the football it winds up in failure. So I was heading towards the regular door and a woman got there ahead of me and it was locked and there never is a “Please use other door” sign posted. She was frustrated and as we were walking towards the other entrance,
Woman: Jesus, why is that door always closed?…and they never put a sign up either
My other complaint about the A&P is their slow automatic doors, I’ve walked into them many times and I thought this would be a good time to vent.
Me: yeah, that stinks…and they have slow doors too
[silence]
Me:…ya know…the doors…when they ARE unlocked…open VERY slowly…very easy to walk into…
[silence and glare]
Jesus, I hope this woman doesn’t think I’m trying to hit on her and very lamely I might add.
Me: uh…my wife and I were just talking about…..about how slow the doors were here…very slow.
[silence]
And we got into the store and I hoped (successfully) that I could get my stuff and not run into her again.

officer, those automatic doors are very slow

officer, those automatic doors are very slow

    • Social Lesser
    • May 28th, 2013

    You fell victim to the oldest trick in the book – what we call “The Little Silver Fakeout.” Some moms never lost the popular-girl-in-high-school mindset.

    • the artist formely known as Tiina
    • May 29th, 2013

    Maybe the doors aren’t too slow. Maybe you’re too quick.

    • spank
    • May 29th, 2013

    “Woman: Jesus, why is that door always closed?”

    You know why she didn’t answer you? ….. because she was talking to Jesus, not you …… you ol’ heathen.

    P.S. A&P? What, Foodtown isn’t good enough for you now? What are you, a food snob?

      • the artist formely known as Tiina
      • May 29th, 2013

      Yes, but Jesus replied thru Tim. Tim is Jesus’s tool.

        • spank
        • May 29th, 2013

        Tim is a tool alright ………..

        Oh, just bustin’ chops Tim, you know I love you like a brother ……. did you know I once shot my brother, but that’s a story for another day …..

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