I Hate Me, part 331,659

I was at work it was early evening and kind of busy. There was a large herd of teenagers moping around the store.  A kid broke away from the herd,
“hey, where’s the bathroom?”
The sink wasn’t draining right, so we were telling people it was broken.
“sorry, it’s not working…Star Wars on the corner has one”
Did I just fucking say Star Wars instead of Starbucks, aaaaauuuugggghhhhh!
“Star Wars?”
“uh….yeah….that’s what uh…that’s what uh we call Starbucks….and they got a bathroom.”
The kid looked perplexed and left and I googled “dementia”.

    • the artist formely known as Tiina
    • May 6th, 2013

    Sometimes I have migraines and they really fuck up my brain and I say the strangest things. One morning I woke up with a particularly bad headache (NOT hangover) and had to call in sick. The conversation with my boss went along these lines:

    Me: l can’t come to work today, I have a terrible microphone.
    Boss: You have a what now?
    Me: A microwave oven.
    Boss: (long silence)
    Me: I mean a migraine.
    Boss: Take the day off.

  1. Many bathroom spies died getting that information to us…

    • spank
    • May 6th, 2013

    I seem to remember someone busting my balls when I said “Star Track” instead of “Star Trek” ??

    Now who could that genius be ……..

    • Aaron Nieradka
    • May 6th, 2013

    who is this “we” you speak of?

  2. The other employees at jacks music

    • feedtim
    • May 6th, 2013

    Let me clarify that. When I said “That’s what we call starbucks” I was trying to make it seem like, “yeah, all the cool guys who work here call starbucks star wars, duh. Get with it, jackson” of course that’s not how it came out but that was the intent. As far as I know, nobody I work with has ever referred to starbucks as star wars

    • galbacco
    • May 6th, 2013

    You’re maybe onto something here. Luke SkyMocha, Han Café Solo, Princess Latte, ummm etc etc…

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