Archive for October 11th, 2011

I Hate Me, Part 200,102

There’s not much to this one but here it is. I went to visit a friend of mine, Mike who opened up a new tattoo shop. It’s called Black Panther Tattoo, which I think is a great name (The image I have for a logo was the two athletes at the ’68 Olympics raising their fists, but they have panther heads. You’re welcome), my wife thought Ninja Tiger* would be a better name, but I digress. Black Panther Tattoo is in Brick which is close to where I live but just far enough away that it’s out of my comfort zone. A lot of medium sized highways that criss-cross, and a bunch of retirement villages make Brick hard to navigate. So I used my GPS** and I got there fine. When I got there, I threw the GPS in the glove box and hung out at the shop for awhile. When I was driving home, I was listening to a Zeppelin mix pretty loudly in the car, when Gallows Pole came on (the beginning of which is pretty quiet)I heard a woman speaking in a slight English monotone, not enough where I could make it what was being said but enough where it was annoying. It sounded like a BBC newscaster was on at the same time, Of course I thought that either my I-pod was fucked or there was some bleed through from the radio (I sometimes listen to NPR and they have BBC reports) and of course I was instantly enraged, “Fuckin’ shit stereo, this is all I fucking need, Aaaaurgh!” It took me about five minutes of rage to realize that I never shut off the GPS and it sounded like I had a tiny proper englishwoman held hostage in my glovebox. It’s pretty amazing how goddamned stupid I can be.

*her idea for the Ninja Tiger logo is a tiger done up all ninja-ey with a “Ninja Tiger” tattoo on it’s arm or paw or shank or whatever it’s called.

**I have the GPS voice set to “Englishwoman”, to add a little class.

Imagine them with panther heads