from the mundane to the mundane and back again

my enemy, my knife

I went up to New York for a meeting. After the meeting I got a coffee with a couple of friends. While standing on the street drinking coffee and talking I felt that my pocket knife was stuck in my pocket. The key ring part (see photo) was stuck on a loose thread. The pocket had been recently sewn, so I figured I’d just yank the knife out of my pocket. Bad move. While I got the knife out I also re-tore my pocket. I found this out as I felt a bunch of change cascade down my leg. A few pieces ended up on the sidewalk, the remainder (21 coins, $1.97) ended up in my shoe. I had a train to catch and I wasn’t gonna take off my shoe on a crowded subway or a train. So there I was with what amounted to an uncomfortable coin insole and getting angrier with every step. When I got home a cold drink and an empty shoe made things better. Cut to the next morning. I was supposed to drop my step daughter off at the bus stop for school and I got up late. So I jumped out of bed, and quickly threw on a shirt and unknowingly the same pair of pants, I jammed my cell phone, pocket knife and change I took out of my shoe back into the torn pocket. As I was running down stairs I felt my knife slide down my leg and some change in my shoe and in my head I was yelling “FUUUUUUUUCK!”

A long time ago when I was in my early twenties, I went on my first real and only job interview. It was with Northwest Orient Airlines as a baggage handler, a friend of mine who worked for them set it up for me.  Since the Northwest Orient headquarters was located near the Minneapolis-St. Paul Airport it was cheaper for them to fly job applicants out there for interviews and physicals. I was pretty psyched, I hadn’t flown much and I kind of felt like a big shot being flown out for an interview. I flew out early and was met with a company van and driven with other applicants to the airline headquarters. I took a physical and went for the interview, I was very nervous. I noticed that the guy doing the interview was named Livingston and I came up with an idea for an interview “icebreaker”. I started the interview with “Doctor Livingston, I presume?” Silence. Crickets. Tumbleweeds. No response, nothing just a dull stare. The stare of a man who had probably heard that shitty joke about a million times. The stare of a man who was in a position of power and didn’t have to listen to that type of stupid bullshit from a prospective grunt worker. The interview lasted about 15 seconds and I was unceremoniously ushered out and brought back to the airport, where my return ticket was a standby and I ended up waiting eight hours for a flight back to Newark.