I Hate Me, Part 188,027

the best part of shopping at Acme

I was doing yard work and had to run to the store before I picked my wife up at work. Late afternoon traffic dictated that I should go to Acme instead of Foodtown. The Acme is in Fair Haven, It’s smaller than Foodtown and is usually more crowded, I try to avoid it when I can. Anyhow, I had to pick up a bag of lemons and a roll of paper towels. I got to the checkout and the total was $5.98. I paid with a ten and my change was $4.02. The best thing about Acme was their checkout change dispenser. the change comes down a chute, it’s like you won something. So the clerk gave me four dollars and there should have been two cents from the dispenser. There was one. Now, I didn’t give a shit about the penny but being a conscientious guy I wanted to let them know that something was wrong with the dispenser.
Clerk- Here’s your four dollars, did ya get your pennies?
Me- …uh…actually…I uh…only got one….but…
(we both started to speak over each other, and of course there was a line behind me. I could hear their exasperated sighs, the same as I would have done if our places were reversed)
Clerk- Oh..so we owe you...
Me- Nononono, I don’t care about the penny…I just..
Clerk-…so…you don’t want the penny…
Me-..I thought you might have run out of pennies…or something’s…
Clerk-…so you do want the penny..
Me-nonono…I don’t care about the penny…maybe it’s broken…I just wanted to…to let you know.
I grabbed my items and fled and was bummed out that my favorite part of shopping at Acme was ruined.

    • fishbreath
    • June 28th, 2010

    fair haven acme has always been a source of anxiety, when i was ten my mother bought me sneakers there for a birthday party that afternoon (yes they sold sneakers at acme, she didn’t want to spend “good money” on regular sneakers cause she knew i’d ruin them. they were fake chuck taylor low tops – the soles were made of plastic and i think they were around $3.99-it was1970).
    The birthday party was at holmdel park, we ran around i stepped in shit and unknowingly got it all over the interior floor of the station wagon.
    acme = mom was right, oy.
    oh, and my niece calls acme “gross but close”
    (because of its proximity to her home)

    • klutch
    • June 29th, 2010

    Also referred to as the “Agony” by some residents

      • fishbreath
      • June 30th, 2010

      good one, gotta use that.

    • CitizenCliff
    • July 2nd, 2010

    Acme is the most depressing supermarket chain in the North East. They should be shut down and replaced by Trader Joes.

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