Yaz birth control pills explained

(A&P Press, Kelly Stinnett)
(Montvale N.J.) Bayer pharmaceuticals bending to government pressure has released a statement explaining how their YAZ birth control pill works. The official statement which is a 10 page document can be broken down into a few understandable points:

* Boston Red Sox star and Hall of Famer (elected 1989) Carl “Yaz” Yastrzemski is multiply cloned and is shrunk down to approx. 1/100,000th of his original size.

* Thousands of “lil Yaz’s” are put into pills, armed with tiny baseball bats.

* After the YAZ contraceptive pill is taken, the microscopic Yaz’s burst free from their pills and form perimeters around unfertilized eggs.

* When sperm attempts to gain access to the egg they are attacked by thousands of bat wielding tiny Yaz’s

* Yaz’s success rate is 99% when taken according to instructions.

this yaz...

...is made from this Yaz

    • john McBain
    • April 12th, 2010

    Not nearly as unsuccessful as Jim Rice Pudding.

    • Art Buchwald
    • April 12th, 2010

    … or a Bernie Carbo rubber.

    • john McBain
    • April 12th, 2010

    I tried beer battered Catfish Hunter and picked up a stomach virus.

    • Matt
    • April 14th, 2010

    The probably used an old can of the short lived Harmon Killebrew

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