American Santa Vs. Russian Santa

While going thru some of my parents’ old things, I came across a cold war era Christmas pamphlet that was distributed by the Bayonne Decency League (the BDL) entitled The American Santa Claus. Here’s an excerpt comparing the American Santa with the Russian Santa:

* The American Santa delivers toys and candy.
* The Russian Santa delivers savage beatings.

* The American Santa wears a red suit the same color as the proud red stripes of the American flag.
* The Russian Santa wears a suit stained red with the blood of innocents.

* The American Santa has friendly, patriotic reindeer pulling his sled thru the night sky.
* The Russian Santa has bloodthirsty flying wolves pulling a dilapidated prison wagon around.

* The American Santa puts toys and treats into stockings hung with care.
* The Russian Santa slops sour borscht into hollowed out peasant feet that are crudely nailed to a wall.

* The American Santa eats milk and cookies left out for him by boys and girls.
* The Russian Santa feasts on childrens dreams and drinks their frightened tears.

    • Bobo
    • December 22nd, 2009

    the original Santa came actually with an assistant who would beat the kids who deserved it (youth of today records in the collection for example). this assistant looked kinda ugly and shit. they still celebrate both in certain remote swiss and austrian mountain parts.

    • Bitet Loddentiler
    • December 25th, 2009

    KRAMPUS!

    • Yakov Smirnoff
    • December 25th, 2009

    You’ll be hearing from my lawyers.

    • feedtim
    • December 28th, 2009

    Bobo- that’s just some weird german punk rock santa you invented in some feverish opium dream
    Loddentilier-I’ve had it up to here with you (my hand is up to my chin) Russian Santa is nothing,NOTHING like Krampus, they’re both mean spirited that’s all.
    Smirnoff-We’ve heard from your lawyers, you have no case. back to hosting new comic night at the Ha Ha Hacienda for you

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