Notes From Das Boot 63

12/15/09 Red Bank
Back home, just sent my computer out to get fixed. In baseball news, the Red Sox got John Lackey, the Phillies got Roy Holliday and the Mets resigned Elmer Dessens, (Mets) prosperity is just around the corner. I missed a lot of writing time with no computer so here’s a non-linear wrap up. We played Wolverhampton, it was a good show but attendance was off as we were going up against a new British glam band phenomena Fey Accompli. We also had one of the worst meals ever served that had nothing to do with a prison. I know that England has a reputation for shitty food, but Rockcity the other club that cooked for us made a real good shepherds pie (with chunky pieces of actual shepherds) so it’s not impossible. The people at Wolfrun Hall (Wolverhampton) made this concoction that was made of boiled beef (actually beef fat) and boiled vegetables that were overcooked to the point of being a mushy green pile and a mushy orange-ish pile. It felt like dinnertime in a Dickensian orphanage. Glasgow was pretty cool and we had a great Indian dinner, the only problem I had was talking with the locals. I know they think they’re speaking English but I wish they would wear small chalkboards and write out what they’re saying like homemade subtitles. A good example would be during sound check when the house lighting guy is yelling over the din “Yah tha fookinstroes ar kinnabroke” (Translation: “Yeah, the fucking strobes are kind of broken”) If he had a chalkboard and wrote out what he said, I wouldn’t have to say “What?!” ten times pissing both us off. I know that I’m in his country but for fucks sake it’s easier to understand German than it is to understand most Scottish. Another new development are the large amounts of violent, shitfaced drunks staggering around England from about 5pm on, This was apparent mostly in Nottingham, Wolverhampton, and Leeds. Guys who look like Jason Statham wannabees looking for fights and pissing on everything. I’m not expecting tea time and doilies but it’s gotten mean in England, a kind of unfocused rage. That’s not where I really wanted to leave it, but that’s about it.

    • Bobo
    • December 15th, 2009

    if you guys would have not bailed them out twice in the last century they would be as well behaved as we Germans are

    • miss Klutch
    • December 15th, 2009

    Apparently Dave needs to put me on the payroll as your Glaswegian translator. Also fluent in northwestern English territories and industrial southern Wales.

  1. I’m not expecting tea time and doilies but it’s gotten mean in England, a kind of unfocused rage.

    that what happens when you take away their guns… they wanna punch and piss instead of shooting you dead like here in america… I’d drink too if my teeth were as bad as their’s…. wait, strike that from the record.

  2. growing up eating every meal of my life cooked by a british woman, my mother, i know all too well about a steaming pile of grey food. unseasoned, overcooked baby food consistency gruel. to add to insult, i inherited my teeth from my mother. braces could not correct british genetics.

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