Archive for May 4th, 2011

Mangled Everyday Torment Skeleton (My Entire Team Sucks IV)

Jesus Christ, as a long suffering Mets fan I knew this year was going to to be rough. I had no illusions, well maybe I thought there was a chance they were going to play 500 baseball. I love baseball, even shitty baseball is better than any other sport but the Mets seem to be testing my limits for shitty baseball. Either flat and unexciting or inept and angrifying they have it covered. I know they ran off a little winning streak but it’s been brutal otherwise. It’s painful to even look at Pelfry anymore, he looks shellshocked and on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Willie Harris was a Mets killer when he was on the Braves and Nationals, he’s still a Mets killer. Chin-Lung Hu has name that would be perfect for a “Hu’s on first” type joke, problem is he never gets to first base. I texted my friend Mike today and asked what the hell happened to Josh Thole this year, he texted back that when he typed “Thole” into his phone it auto-corrected it to “Toilet”. Even cel-phones are laughing at them. Their best pitcher Pedro Beato just got put on the DL. David Wright is tied for second… for most strike outs. Reyes is still an exciting player but he’ll be gone soon. And…they just lost another game, boo-fucking-hoo.

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