Archive for April 11th, 2011

I Hate Me, Part, 255,618

I was late for work. I had run some errands before hand and was now stuck behind a slow car with Florida plates. Not only was the car painfully slow but it got even slower at every corner and what seemed like every driveway (“Is this it, …nooooo……Is this it, …uh…nooooo,….is this it…..mmmmmmm….noooooo” X Infinity). I was cursing so much that I was making up curses that hadn’t been invented yet, like GODCOCKFUCKER! As I was getting closer to work, the Florida car pulled into a left hand turn lane, thank Christ.  Then all over sudden out of nowhere this pick-up truck pulled a douchebag move and cut me off. I was fuming, we both got to the next stop light and I pulled up next to him, beeped my horn and gave him my “what the fuck” look. It was at this time that I noticed the blue flashing light on his dashboard and I realized that he was off to some sort of emergency. I quickly changed my “what the fuck” look to the hands up “sorry, I fucked up” look. After a million years the light turned green. Looking back on it though, if it was that big an emergency why was he waiting for the light to change.

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